I am an activist. I will always be. It’s not a part of me I can turn off. (Trust me, I’ve tried.) I am also an “empath”, which beyond mythical definitions of that word, simply means that I am forever energetically connected to the energy around me be it the people on the streets, society at large or where the state of the global situation is headed.

I’m also very college-educated on matters of structural, intuitional and historical subjects that constantly inform me of what exactly is happening in current events and why.. and more urgently, where it’s all heading. I went to college for seven years to study anthropology and sociology; it’s another passion of mine. Lastly, I came from a very poor background despite my childhood having so much love at home, and I went through massive amounts of psychological, mental and spiritual abuse and suffering the first seven years living in LA for “daring” to come to this city poor with the dream of being a full-time actor.

With all that being said, I’m always constantly annoyed by how prevalent toxic positivity is amongst the culture of actors and the entertainment industry. The Film, TV and Theater industry almost runs on mythical stories of luck, “karma” or rags-to-riches stories that are so hard to understand the inner-workings of by the masses outside of those who experienced them. As a result, actors are very superstitious, “energy” sensitive and really deeply bought into things like astrology, law-of-attraction mindset, destiny and so forth. There’s also a lot of privileged individuals and families of such individuals who’ve never really experienced just how brutal, unforgiving and unjust this society can be for those at the bottom; poor people and especially marginalized/people of color; a “divisive” conversation that has moved to the forefront of American society. Do they really truly know what it’s like to suffer? I often assume, no.

Because of that unfortunately, there is this cultural divide between the mindsets of the “haves” and the “have-nots” in the acting industry. Actors get SO uncomfortable hearing others talk about poverty or injustice or anything that messes with their “success” or “positivity-only” mindset. For that reason, people coming from less-privileged backgrounds and historically disadvantaged communities are naturally shunned or avoided by their more privileged “positive” colleagues in this business and the cycle is perpetuated. I care about my acting community so much, but as someone’s who’s educated and in-tune with the structural issues of our time, it’s painful to always be reminded as to how risky it is to let that side of me speak out. When I was homeless for three-to-five years, I would have continual experiences of actors making a “bug-spray” gesture with their hand and walk away from me or being told “You know how you can stop being poor? Stop talking about it!” I’ve seen my candid written questions ignored in Q&As and have had heard full-on groans from audiences when I bring up the topic of homelessness and my experience with it. This can go doublely-triply risky if you question or dissent against the industry’s held-in-high-regard institutions and how their practices perpetuate stagnant mobility for the most disadvantaged in our acting community.

It was the main motivator behind why I tried so hard to launch and sustain “The Actor’s Journey” web-series back in 2017 so it could chronicle just how hard a person has to work (at the great risk of their life and health) to even survive in LA, let alone becoming a full-time actor. Ironically, I couldn’t sustain it because my life was too intense and the editing alone took dozens of hours I did not have for even 10 minute episodes.

In time, I quickly realized it’s part of a much much larger issue that spans across eras of history and extends beyond my industry: Why we hate talking about the poor so much and continue to blame them for their own misfortunes and struggle so immensely to see the simple structural issues in society that perpetuate poverty is beyond me. It’s like the best way to avoid become poor is by disassociating from them as much as possible. There’s a phenomenon in psychology that’s based in animal biology where when a predator is present and attacks a nearby bystander, the animals in the immediate vicinity of the attack will often act like nothing is happening because there’s something deep inside us that says we’ll be safe if we just let it happen and don’t acknowledge it. I feel like on some deeper level, it’s a phenomenon that tied to what’s called the “Bystander Affect” and so it may be as timeless as poverty and greed itself.

For a profession that wholly embraces treks into the hardest and even darkest aspects of our humanity, and celebrates those journeys, why do we, as an actor community, struggle so much with facing those sincerely negative emotions and experiences in others that are just a part of life?

It’s a huge problem in my industry and I will absolutely make sure that it’s called out once and for all to prevent this aspect of our culture to continue to perpetuate the class disparity that exists within in our industry. The privileged should not have the lion’s share of opportunity in our industry. “Becoming” an actor should not be a racket that only the most well-off in our community should enjoy. Being an actor should not be an eccentric starry-eyed pursuit for the child of the wealthy and the well off. If you have the talent and the work ethic, it should be just as accessible to you as every “nepo-baby” you have to compete against. Before the beginning of this journey, I believed that my solitary goal was to “succeed” in this industry. But now that I’ve experienced everything that I have, I now know that my additional mission is to change it… for everyone who’ll come after me.

Written by: Courage